#886 Developing Charisma

People are mostly hitting what's thrown at them. If you want a different outcome. If you want more interesting conversations, if you want to create rapport, throw a changeup.

A change-up, today is simple. Just ask questions and listen. That's it! It's simple, but it isn't easy.

In NLP, we're taught to listen in "up-time" Up-time means without distraction. That means you aren't answering your phone, reading an email, glancing at a text, or formulating you're your reply while someone is speaking. It means you're actively listening. You're nodding, smiling, maintaining good eye contact, making audible sounds to confirm or acknowledge what's said, and leaning in and making the appropriate facial expressions to show understanding.

As you go through the world this week, try this; try asking an additional, deeper question when you usually would have responded with something about you. Do it two or three times in a row, and you will completely change the complexion of the conversations you've been having here to fore. Pause a second or two before responding to become more present.

Charisma is a fascinating thing. We assign to another, as though they possess some magic, but charismatic people are charismatic because they make us feel good about ourselves. They ask questions about our favorite subject, us, and then listen and ask more about us, and we think they're great.

People do business with people they like, and everyone likes someone who listens to and is interested in them.

Own Your Sales Gene…